Mistake and human is like the law of sowing and harvest, as far as Human exists, and in this form, we will make mistakes, and for the purpose of peaceful coexistence, we will always need to apologize for these mistakes.
Here is where “I am sorry” comes in. Have you ever met someone who can never or find it difficult to say I am sorry to people? Call it pride or ego, but some people will rather find other means to apologize than utter those words. We call those people proud right? But do you know that it is not all those that say I am sorry that have a good intention? Some people will say sorry for some of these reasons:
1. They want to appear humble
2. They want to get you off their back.
3. They want to avoid punishment.
4. They know “I am sorry” will melt you, earning quick forgiveness.
5. They need something and only you can give them.
6. Lastly, they want to use it to blackmail you. You may not know, but there is an unwritten code which kinda states that you shouldn’t bring up issues that someone has apologized for, bring it up again, and you are unforgiving.
Here are the reasons/situations you should not say “I am sorry”
1. When you do not really mean it. Some peolme have an auto answer for everything you say, don’t apologize when you do not mean it, when you say it, be serious with it.
2. Don’t apologize when you know you will do the same thing again if you have the opportunity. If you believe in something, stand for it, if you know your action or reaction is right, don’t say you are sorry for it, cause you are not and that makes you an hypocrite. Instead, explain your reasons and give the other person time to understand you. Saying sorry and doing the same thing again makes you unreliable sort of. Another thing is, the other person may not know when you are genuinly sorry about something.
3. Don’t say it to get someone of your back: especially people you deal with everyday. Communication is a fundamental part of any kind of relationship, learn to talk it out, not try to escape at all time.
4. To escape punishment: even if you say sorry to avoid punishment, make sure it comes from your heart.
5. Cause of what you will get: some of us can be quite dramatic when we want something, we will say just about anything. If you are not sorry, don’t say you are cause of what you will get.
6. All said, check your intention(s), any other reason you say sorry that is not you being really and deeply sorry is wrong. Should you apologise when you are wrong, yes, it is important, but apologising for the wrong reason can kill your relationship.
7. Add yours in the comment box below.
when was the last time you said sorry? What was your reason? *winks*